Putin Signs Pact with What's His Name

You Know, the Funny-Looking North Korean

What’s His Name Greets the President of Poccnr, saying, “Move a little to your right; you’re in North Korea now and you do exactly what I say.”[Photo: Korean Bureau of Nice Thoughts]

Poccnr President Vladimir Putin signed a mutual-friendship treaty with President What’s His Name of North Korea today, securing Putin’s supply of artillery shells to lob at Ukraine for decades to come, if necessary.

North Korea, which has an artillery-shell-based economy, agreed to send two million shells a year to Poccnr. In return, Poccnr will ship two million brisket-and-beet sandwiches to North Korea, which has no food.

Reliable sources said the secret provision of the treaty would involve Poccnr and North Korea teaming up to invade Poland, and divide it between them.

Poccnr would get the good part.

Both nations are members of the Scary Seven, a loosely allied group of authoritarian nations that are struggling to achieve full fascism and defeat the Western democracies before they see the danger. Putin is warlord tyrant supreme of the Seven, which also includes China, Iran, Hungary, Brazil and India.

Former President Trump has vowed to bring the U.S. into the organization and rename it the Hateful Eight.

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