Assad Spotted at Mar-a-Lago?
'Did Some Good Things': Trump
A tall, unattractive man resembling Bashar al-Assad was spotted at breakfast in Mar-a-Lago’s main dining room Sunday morning. The deposed Syrian dictator—if that was really him—sat next to President-elect Donald Trump, trading compliments and quips as guests clustered around, offering consolations.
He wore a hood partially obscuring his face, but ate a hearty breakfast, according to reliable sources.
“It’s too bad my special guest didn’t get here last week when I still had some big jobs to hand out,” Trump quipped. “But I hear there’s an opening at United Healthcare, so things may work out for him after all.”
Elon Musk, also present, said he might be able to use the tall, unattractive man at his newly created Department Of Overseeing Money, “if he’s who I think he is, because he’s very good at removing unnecessary personnel.”
The three tall, unattractive men then circulated about the room, with Trump introducing Maybe Assad to his billionaire friends.
Asked if the mystery guest was indeed the person everyone thought he was, Trump spokesperson Steven Cheung declined to comment.
“I decline to comment,” he said. “Don’t quote me.”
In Syria, rebel officials confirmed that Assad had resigned and left the country. Gleeful Syrians danced in the streets and tore down statues of the Assad family and also tore down officials of the Assad regime. “We are happy the Assads are gone,” said one man in the crowd, “and looking forward to meeting our new oppressors.”
Fake news! Assad went directly to Mara Lago headquarters in Moscow, where he also enjoyed a hearty breakfast. A rare slip by the usually impeccable Grossberger reporting crew. Understandable though, because the two venues are incredibly similar, except one is a bit warmer.
https://substack.com/home/post/p-152847663
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