America Needs a New Electorate!

This One Is a Disaster

350 million Americans pose for group photo. The worst ones pushed to the front.

With only ten—or maybe eleven; I keep losing track—days before the election, all the polls show Democrat Kamala Harris tied with the demented fascist.

As the Dragoons in Gilbert & Sullivan’s “Patience” put it:

Now is not this ridiculous, and is not this preposterous?
A thorough-paced absurdity - explain it if you can.

As it happens, I can and I will. It ain’t the fault of the media, or the social media, or the fake media, or the educational system, or the tech billionaires, or Tucker Carlson, or the Electoral College, or the Jews, or the Arabs, or the Black males, or the transgenders, or the illegal immigrants, or the Marvel Comics Universe.

It’s us.

The American people. You and me and yo mama.

We are seriously fucked up.

(I know, you guessed that’s where I was going, since the headline gave it away, but bear with me, I’m working with a 600-year-old format here.)

What this country needs is a citizen transplant. A fresh new batch of deciders, sane, intelligent, well-educated and interested in domestic governance and foreign affairs.

Not this pack of beef-jerky-eating goons who once made crazy Donald our president and could do it again if allowed near the voting booths on November 5.

I’m not supposed to say this.

Politicians and pundits know you never slam THE MERICAN PIPPLES or any large segment thereof. For some reason the small-minded bastards resent it and vote for even worse pols than usual.

But say it I must for it must be said.

So what can be done?

Nothing.

Where am I gonna find 160 million trustworthy new voters who can step in on short notice?

Norway? Nigeria? Let me know if you’ve got any ideas.